Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Randomize