I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize