To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize