You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
