A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
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