This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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