omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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