just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize