Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
