everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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