Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
