I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
