i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
