Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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