Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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