even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
