they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
