Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
