isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
