Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
