Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
