you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize