it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I need moral support for this bender
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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