This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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