you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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