No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Still dying that you shit outside
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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