just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Randomize
