clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
