If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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