she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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