he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
