fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
he fucked my hip out of place.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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