I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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