She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
