So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
