I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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