Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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