you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
My vagina is officially offended.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
