she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
