thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
