Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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