I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize