He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
