She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
