Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
It's shark week go big or go home
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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