remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
