I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
