you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
