Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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