69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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